We'd Rather You Didn't...World Leader Edition

Much has been made of entertainers who dabble in politics, but what happens when the tables are turned? Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin took to the stage recently at a children's benefit in Saint Petersburg.  Good luck in your day job Mr. Prime Minister, you're going to want to hold onto it!

We’d Rather You Didn’t

We’ve been bit harried these days and so have gotten away from some of our beloved regular features. But as we both have CDs nearing completion (and availability) we find we are beset from all sides by well meaning advice and analyses of How The Music Business Works. With this in mind, we have decided it’s time for another segment of We’d Rather You Didn’t.

All told Your redheads have been singing professionally for as long as Cher has been alive, and in that time we have picked up a few tidbits of information about the music business so we’d really rather strangers didn’t assume that we are lost little lambs in need of guidance. In fact, here are few things we’d like to share with you, especially if you are thinking of entering the business and getting rich by Christmas.


1.)The check is NOT in the mail.

2.)Though someone may have opened for Englebert Humperdink at a Muscular Dystrophy Telethon in 1978, it does not necessarily follow that he or she knows or, for that matter, even met said Englebert.


3.) In light of #2, therefore, said someone probably can’t get anyone a gig headlining Caesar’s Palace.


4.) Therefore, singing for free in his or her Greek restaurant in Lodi, NJ may not be the career move he or she is suggesting it will be, as no one can compete with flaming saganaki.


5.) The check is still not in the mail


6.) Though Hot Blooded was a big hit for Foreigner, it’s really not the right song for either of us.

7.) We know your friend Ace very successfully managed his local tire shop for many years, but that’s not really the same as managing artists.


8.) Giving “Power of Attorney” to a manager does not mean he will have the authority to get you an attorney should you need one. Indeed, it means something very different.

9.) Music actually is a “Real Job”.

10.) Check? What check?

Some of the spirit of this list is admirably captured in DC Anderson’s song Your Father & I Have Been Talking. It’s our Thanksgiving present to you. Scroll down to the next post and enjoy!

We'd Rather You Didn't...

An occasional series in which your Redheads relay horrifying things they’ve seen, heard, and (gasp) even done on stage that they’d rather not experience again.

Wendy Lane: The first thing that springs to mind is the singer who said before every song in her set “the next song I’m going to try to do for you is…” This led to a whole string of emotions beginning with Curiosity: Why was she going to try? Might she be suddenly sucked into the piano by a force beyond her control? This was followed by Irritation: I made the effort to come and see her and now she’s not sure she’ll be able to do the job? Which led me ultimately to worry: What can I, a simple audience member, do to help her if she is unable to continue? It was a most uncomfortable performance for those on stage and those in the audience. To quote that great musical sage Yoda “do, or do not. There is no try”.


Laurel: Sometimes performers may forget a line or a lyric; the major difference between seasoned professionals and the inexperienced is that the pros aren't thrown off the horse when this happens. After all, whatever do you think seasoned them in the first place? That's right: messing up in front of an audience. The pros don’t lose their rhythm. They keep going. If the mistake is so bad, so very very bad that there is no moving forward, they "pick themselves up, dust themselves off, and start all over again". They do not blame anyone. They do not allow the audience to feel uncomfortable for one second. And they go on to have a good time, because they already know they are human.

The inexperienced don't. It has come as a terrible shock. And so they freeze. Or blame the band.

Or cry. Or blame the lighting person. Or melt in to a puddle like the Wicked Witch of the West. All of which make the audience have to worry about the performer. This worry is not part of the audience's job description. THEIR job is to have a god time. Period.

The performer's job is to allow that to happen. Encourage it to happen. Inspire it. Create it. And lighten up!

What about you? Do you have a performance pet peeve? Do share it with us, BUT spare us names and other identifying details. We’ve all been there so we’re way more interested in the what than the who did it! We’re listening.