Saturday, July 5, 2008

On The Road With the RedHeads

Or, as we like to call it Trapped in the Car With Wendy Lane and Laurel as They Try to Find the Gig…Random musings, insights, and other stuff from our summer road trip….

  • A MATH PROBLEM: If a car leaves New York City carrying two redheaded chick singers on a three hundred mile drive how many times can they stop and still make a 7:00 PM gig the following evening?
  • WILD ANIMAL SIGHTINGS: 3 deer, a herd of Alpaca, 1 cranky snapping turtle, a raven, wild turkey (of the non alcoholic variety)various pigs, cows, cats, dogs, horses and one vicious snake which Laurel swears was only a garter snake. Wendy Lane did not stick around to ask it.
  • Being roundly trounced at Scrabble by a DRUMMER is not something of which to be proud.
  • Is a large taxidermied bear an appropriate souvenir? Does he have to wear a seatbelt?
  • There was a gig in here somewhere. Music was made, applause was heard and all was right with the world.
  • Ice cream is always better when heralded by a giant chicken sign.
  • A trompe L’Oeil fireplace in a hotel room is a nice touch but it cannot make up for marshmallowy beds, spiders in bathroom, and lack of a mini-bar.
  • Is it really possible to maintain deep philosophical discussions on the nature of life and art when there are outlet malls every fifty miles?
  • While we’re on the subject if we stop and shop at said mall on the way back from a gig is it tax deductible?
  • Mapquest is NOT our friend.
  • ROAD TRIP WORK RULE: No matter what work you bring along, or how well intended you may be the only thing accomplished in your million hour car ride will be much staring out the window while muttering “I really should get to work”.
  • Don’t hit the skunk. Do. Not. Hit. The. Skunk.
  • You cannot post pictures of your trip on your blog if the camera never leaves the confines of your bag. “Want to see my pictures of Altoids, assorted hygiene products and loose change?” does not have the same ring to it as “See I told you big foot really does exist!”
  • ANOTHER MATH PROBLEM: If you drive five miles out of your way to save three cents a gallon on gas will that justify an extra scoop of ice cream at the Big Chicken?
  • Large doses of Diet soda and Smartees may keep you awake, but they won’t make you any more interesting.
  • You can have a hat, or well coifed hair, not both.
  • Mile #598 of a 600 mile trip is not the best time to begin your blog post. (especially after copious quantities of the aforementioned stimulants)

So what are you up to this summer? Are you traveling? Working? Just hanging out in the backyard with your feet in a kiddy pool? What’s your greatest road trip story ever? Do tell all, and you could snag this month’s RedHead award, a nifty travel version of Scrabble, guaranteed to save you the humiliation of ever losing to a drummer! We’ll announce the lucky winner on July 30th.

See you around the BBQ!

Wendy Lane & Laurel


Naomi Hanks said...

Hello Wendy Bird! This is Naomi (Uda) Hanks. Just found your blog on Rachels blog and thought I would say hi! Hope all is well with you. (It looks like it on your blog) Take care!


AitchD said...

Don't take it so hard, drummers should always beat singers at Scrabble. They're imprinted with doublets and triplets. They're quadridextrous (and have over-developed right & left brain hemispheres), they thrive on fills, and when it's not their turn they are in their unique element of the interval, that part of music that defines rhythm. Unlike singers, who worry over sibilants, drummers depend on them, especially in a quiet place. Listen to their voiceless brushes soft-shoeing 'double-word score', 'triple-word score', 'double-letter score', 'triple-word score'. You probably hum a lot when you play Scrabble, am I right? Finally, 'Scrabble' is a percussive word, so maybe you should challenge drummers to Monopoly or Parcheesi. (Hey, speaking of brush work, check out Dave Tough with Benny Goodman on 'Sweet Lorraine' - I swear he was trying, and succeeding, to replicate the old sound of shellac recordings, he plays at a perfect 78 rpm!)

Laurel Massé said...

OK, aitchd, I am impressed. And your arguments make sense. Scrabble is all about improvisation, so it is logical to assume that some drummers should beat some singers. A jazz drummer is going to beat a classical singer, just based on comfort with improvisation. But is a classical tympanist going to beat a great scat singer? Not so sure, my dear. Or a musical theater drummer whose part is meticulously arranged by the composer?
I rather think not.
Your move...and watch out. I have some Qs and a U or two.

AitchD said...

No argument from me, ms Laurel. No one feels good getting beat at Scrabble even if the game depends on luck and fate. And I wouldn't ever try to argue with a true singer except when I want to learn something (thank you!). Besides, I share your biases, that drummers are essentially the same martial troop organizers they always were, and true singers have always made grass grow. (Personal stuff: I was born and raised as a red-head; I notice that ms Wendy's recent post capitalizes the j in Jazz, which I applaud and follow, being a Jazzian and not a convert, in her womb my mother hearing Nat Cole, Benny Goodman, Xavier Cugat - do you know Miami Beach Rhumba? - but all from A.M. radio or a Victrola.) You can't blame people for discovering drum fills when they heard Ringo on Strawberry Fields Forever for the first time. You have a Q means you very quietly (and successfully) challenged my 'quadridextrous'. This is better, with the Q in play 'quintessence' and 'quintessential' stretch into the ether in plenty of time to hover and sway on Monday night at Birdland!